One of the themes that show up a lot in my work is to ask for help or to make a request. The conversation goes as follow:
Coach: Did you ask for help?
Client: Well, I just haven’t ask of it
Coach: How would it be if you asked for help?
Client: I just do not know how to ask for it
Coach: Imagine that you are with the person who can help you and just ask for it.
Client: I just can't. I don't know how! I think I do not ask for anything, I just don't do it.
Asking for help breaks a culture that values independence as a flag, as symbol of struggle that we must hold high, steady and with great courage.
What would happen when we see that the flag does not suits us anymore? How would it be to ask for help?
These are some of the questions that show up in these conversations related to asking for help.
Many declare to be tired of being alone, they can’t hold it anymore, and they are hoping for someone to step up to help.
For many asking for help is a great challenge, and to notice that they haven’t be able been able to maintain their independence makes them question the flag, and many times unveil hidden emotions.
The body resents enduring for a long time, gets tired of the effort and feels like surrendering. Learning to ask for help is a way to renew strength and find motivation to continue.
To reflect in how we ask for help, what we need help with, who we ask for help, shows us a part of ourselves that we do not visit very often and we maybe be surprised by the outcomes.